Harold has lived in a nursing home near his niece ever since he started showing increasing signs of dementia some years ago. He moved in after he was no longer able to care for himself at-home, his wife had passed away, and his only son no longer lived near his small, rural hometown.

His friends were concerned about him, so I asked the long term care Ombudsman to check on Harold for me, but his care and condition are confidential information and the Ombudsman was not allowed to report his condition back to me.

I decided to make a surprise visit to the nursing home. I talked with Harold for only a few minutes, as lunch was about to be served and I didn’t want to disrupt the staff’s daily routine any more than was needed. I wanted to talk with him about his care, how often his family visited, and whether he was happy at the nursing home.

He seemed happy to see me, even though I was a stranger to him. I introduced myself and told him that I had a few questions for him. He told me that he was well cared for (he seemed to be), what activities he had been involved with (bingo mostly), whether he liked the facility’s food (he did), and how often others visited him (not very much, but some).

He was well dressed and groomed, as someone had taken the time to shave him that morning. I was pleased with the condition of the facility, which was clean, and the staff were friendly. The staff were helping him walk to the dining room when I arrived and were calling him by his name as they talked with him. As he and I visited, the staff often asked him if they could get anything for him.

This was a new phase in his life and Harold seemed happy with it. The staff and other residents of the facility had made Harold feel welcomed. He seemed to like them, and they liked him. He had a new home now with new friends, even though his old friends missed talking with him.

Anyone who leaves the home where they’ve lived for many years and moves to a nursing home in a new town will find it very disruptive and disconcerting. But, considering that he had dementia and that patients with dementia often have great difficulty with unfamiliar surroundings, Harold had adjusted quite well.

Even though he wished he had more visitors, Harold was happy and seemed well cared for. That’s what I wanted to know. I just wish there were more volunteers who visit people in nursing homes when family and friends can’t.

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To find out how to be a nursing home volunteer in Southern Illinois, call the regional Ombudsman.

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