Elsie
by John M. Smith, Executive Director
Egyptian Area Agency on Aging

Elsie taught me about grapes ... not how to buy, eat, or drink the juice from grapes; but how she cultivated grapes and harvested them just as they ripen and are at their sweetest. She spent many hours in her small backyard vineyard looking after her grapevines.

Elsie told me stories about how she took great care to properly tie them up. She would have them trimmed each year. She told me that it was an art form and she preferred that an expert, someone she knew, help her trim them each year. She must have trusted her expert a great deal, because Elsie wouldn't let anyone harm her grapevines.

She gave me some of her homemade grape jelly a few times. It was quite good as I recall. Of course every brand of jelly tastes good to me, but Elsie's grape jelly was the best. There was something special about her homemade jelly, especially since she made it from her own grapes.

I first met Elsie at the senior citizens center when I was beginning my career in this business. She was very active at the center and with the affairs of the seniors' club. She always treated me honestly and with dignity. She was always curious about me and wanted to know me better, and she was willing to share with me her recent adventures.

I didn't know many people at the senior center when I first arrived, and I really wasn't sure who I could trust. But Elsie soon put me at ease as she developed a friendship with me. She didn't always agree with my decisions, but she was able to communicate her differences in a way which I respected and was eager to hear.

She never hid her feelings nor was she deceitful. I knew where I stood with Elsie as she always defined her boundaries and limits. But, she was always careful to express herself in such a way as to ensure that our friendship would grow stronger through our mutual respect for each other.

Elsie was the kind of person who cultivated her friends just as carefully as her grapes. She worked hard each day to ensure her friendships were growing, not only with me but with others. Sometimes friendships needed a little extra care and she would always find the time for ours.

I never knew much about her youth, where she lived, whether she worked. Elsie's husband passed away before I knew her well. My most vivid memory of her was watching her live out her golden years by growing things -- her grapes and her friendship with others.

Making friends isn't always an easy task. They have to be cultivated carefully and receive a little extra attention from time to time. Just like her grapes, Elsie had a knack for cultivating hers. I've always admired her for that and have tried to emulate her style.

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